I don't know how many people out there have experienced this. I was told this would definitely happen to me at some point. Well its happened! We're far past the honeymoon stage of being in the UK and don't get me wrong I'm still appreciative of being here and enjoying most of what comes with it, but I have definitely hit my critical funk. In fact I've been in the critical funk for a few weeks now.

What is the critical funk you ask? We'll its one of those phases where you just can't help but think, however this country does it, my own country (aka: Canada) just does it better!

My understanding is the British are supposed to do it right and generally they are quite a lovely people. However London is not really comprised of British people. Its a shmab of all kinds of people. Maybe in the British countryside they do it right, but here in London, I swear no one gives a damn, especially when it comes to customer service! I have never received such awful customer service in my life until I moved to London! You pretty much have to get rude to get what you want and then you get dubbed as an "arrogant American." Great, just great. Especially because there is a huge difference being categorised as American over Canadian internationally.

For examples of my critical funkiness here are the following...

1. The post service and yes, even currier service here is the worst. No exaggeration! For the one who's big into ordering and shopping online THIS IS PROBLEM! Here the local postman just cannot be relied upon. I now understand why my one flatmat has everything delivered to her at work. Well I can't get packages delivered to me at work... I work in a massive hospital! No one would find me, especially with this post system! So far a running tally of the following has occurred in regards to the post...

a. My previous employer mailed my certificate of training for my new job here... it never arrived. They had to resend via Fedex which I ended up have to go to and pick up myself!
b. I ordered stuff on amazon... the postman never knocked or rang the doorbell. Everyday he just dropped another piece of paper off saying no one was home! I was home at every attempt he came by!
c. The real rich experience was when UPS (yes even UPS) put my 200 pound Arbonne package into the trash bin and left me a note telling me the package had ben dropped off in the trash bin! All I can say is what if the rubbish guys came by and took away the trash that day?
d. Also, another currier guy gave one of our very expensive apple products to the neighbour instead of us when his delivery required PROOF OF IDENTITY and a SIGNATURE! Now maybe in some places you can rely on the neighbour to get you your package, but this is definitely not the case in London. Then to top it off, it happened to be the wrong package. The neighbour got some other poor bloque's package! haha. You can imagine my delight at the following phone call: the delivery guy is sweating bullets - yeah, I guess so - serves you right.
e. Another postman "hid" my flatmates package in the bush. Seriously. Are you serious? I have even more post stories like how things are lost in the post all the time, but I will stop here.

2. Setting up a bank account! To all you Canadians out there - please kiss our bankers! They are the best. I cannot stress how good a banking system Canada has.

a. Rick and I are in the process of switching to HSBC in the UK for a number of reasons but mainly because I just couldn't handle the stupidity of our current bank Natwest and their ability to try and make everything inconveniently over secure. So secure in fact, that it pretty much makes it impossible to do your banking. Now here's the clincher: despite their impeccable security we have had 3 bank cards compromised. Then they attempt to mail you new ones that require signatures. I'll let you figure out how that went over with the post.

b. I went to the ATM of my bank to deposit money. There were no envelopes. The machine does not give a "deposit" option. Later on I was telling my one flatmate about how I thought it weird I couldn't deposit my money via the ATM. She responded with "that would be convient." Apparently its never been an option here. Are you kidding me?

c. Banks are not generally open on Saturdays. Well how the hell am I supposed to deposit anything? I work during the week and your ATM's don't have a deposit option!

d. To open a bank account (despite that we already have one UK bank account) you must give proof of who you are, proof of an address and proof of how much money you make. The first two seem reasonable, but proof of my income? Are you insane? Didn't your country just go through major recession and most of your banks almost go bankrupt? You should be on your knees begging me for my hard earned money! Since when did a bank need to know how you made your money in order to house it? Its just plain crazy. Never has a bank in Canada required this of me just to open an account.

Well I will stop here. I guess my only beefs are really with banking and post service. I have ranted long enough and according to my husbands "20 minute rant rule" I have probably gone over that just to write this. I guess some things never change who you are.

• Printer-friendly version